I begin, I commit. I leave in search of you, through the mountain winters.
Dead trees through a car window on a foggy monsoon morning, along the road to Ponmudi hill station on the outskirts of Thiruvananthapuram district. Shot on Kodak Eastman Double-X 35mm motion picture film.
I shiver as I meander through my cold, clouded memories, in search of you.
An abandoned vantage point near Ponmudi. Rusty gazebos and shedding deciduous trees dot the misty landscape. Shot on Kodak Eastman Double-X 35mm motion picture film.
I see remnants of you, haunting my world.
A limping, old, lone woman struggles through the icy winds on the Ponmudi hill roads. She clutches tightly onto the shawl wrapped around her torso, giving her the slightest protection against the frost. Shot on Kodak Eastman Double-X 35mm motion picture film.
But to the life that remains, I am invisible.
A lone dog sitting atop a hill covered in yellowing long grass in Ponmudi, looking out expectantly at the rolling hilltops. Shot on CineStill 400D 35mm colour film.
The benches you once sat on, I sit on and wonder.
An unoccupied park bench in Kowdiar, Thiruvananthapuram city. Sunlight penetrates through the foliage and spotlights the freshly repainted colonial-era bench. The Kowdiar area is home to several such 20th century English benches, street lamps, houses, etc. Shot on Ilford HP5 Plus 35mm film.
The faces of our city are hollow.
Two mannequins clad with dusty forgotten churidars peeking out of a sunlit, abandoned boutique in Pettah, Thiruvananthapuram. Pettah is an old entry point to Thiruvananthapuram city, marked by distinctly older architecture and lesser levels of urbanisation. Shot on Ilford HP5 Plus 35mm film.
They stare blankly, indifferent to my search and struggle.
A dusty, painted stone statue of an Indian army general standing under the canopy of Vellayambalam streets in Thiruvananthapuram city. He stands on guard, alert, outside a nondescript, empty, rundown warehouse shed. Shot on Ilford HP5 Plus 35mm film.
I reach the ends of our lands, empty-handed.
Seafoam meeting mossy rocks on the golden sands of the Varkala coastal municipality on the outskirts of Thiruvananthapuram district. Shot on Lomography 800 35mm colour film.
The face at the end of the road is empty, still. They stand solemnly, rewarding me but with silence.
A lone kite seller waddling through the wet sands of Kovalam beach, Thiruvananthapuram. Rising sea levels over the past decade have diminished the beach to a dangerous, narrow strip, displacing all stalls and sellers who once vended along the coast. Shot on Kodak Gold 200 35mm colour film.
I look out into the infinite, and I ruminate. Were you ever there? What even were you?
Bluish clouds and fading golden sunlight meets the undulating waters of the vast Arabian Sea, along a hilly path in Varkala, Thrivuananthapuram district. Shot on Lomography 800 35mm colour film.
